(Written in the Delhi airport a few days ago)
This is my first trip to India since we lived here two years ago. On Tuesday, Jeff and I stopped by the JPAL office to see old friends and colleagues, one of whom asked me what I think now that I'm back. I said, "There are some things I miss and some things I don't." I did not provide him with this list, but it's been percolating in my brain over the past week (sorry the last post's not a funny one...).
Things I Miss (in no particular order)
It's remarkable how quickly I slipped back into the comforts of American culture when I returned two years ago - passing unnoticed by all men but Jeff, smelling clean sea breezes, drinking straight from the tap. I actually I think I could live in India if it weren't for the constant stares of strange men; the traffic, noise and dense press of people are part of the adventure, but having to constantly guard my gaze is not. Every morning, we read the Times of India with breakfast, and there was always some prominent politician decrying violence against women. Top-level support (or at least lip-service) for women's rights is important, but, despite being very rarely in risk of real danger, it's going to be a long while before I feel completely at ease here.
This is my first trip to India since we lived here two years ago. On Tuesday, Jeff and I stopped by the JPAL office to see old friends and colleagues, one of whom asked me what I think now that I'm back. I said, "There are some things I miss and some things I don't." I did not provide him with this list, but it's been percolating in my brain over the past week (sorry the last post's not a funny one...).
Things I Miss (in no particular order)
- Certain foods: mangoes (mango milkshakes!), crispy chili potatoes, Choco Frappes at CCD, chai
- Good friends - Rashmi, Girish, Nikhil, et al
- Cheap and easy transportation via auto rickshaw
- Believe it or not, for nearly all of our auto rides, the drivers agreed to use the meter! Times they are a changin' ...
- Street puppies on every corner, especially the ones that look just like our Lalu
- Funny mistranslations/phrasings on most signs
- The thrill of joy and surprise when you see an imported American treat like Diet Dr. Pepper
Things I Don't Miss
- Smells: a heady blend of sweat, urine, feces, car exhaust, spices and incense.
- Constant solicitation for money, by beggars, rickshaw drivers, vendors and basically any male stranger
- "Hey! Hello! WHAT'S YOUR NAME??!!" is hysterical the first 5 times, funny the next 3 times, and then you're just done.
- Stares - not the gentle curiosity of American people-watching, but the unbreakable leer reserved especially for foreign women.
- If I put in a little effort, I can certainly be pretty, but I have no illusions about being drop-dead gorgeous. However, these stares have literally caused at least one minor collision that I know about when I was in Delhi. Maybe it's easier for truly beautiful women, who are accustomed to unwanted attention. But as I explained to Jeff, I could cover my arms to the wrist and my legs to the toe, and the quantity and intensity of stares would not change.
It's remarkable how quickly I slipped back into the comforts of American culture when I returned two years ago - passing unnoticed by all men but Jeff, smelling clean sea breezes, drinking straight from the tap. I actually I think I could live in India if it weren't for the constant stares of strange men; the traffic, noise and dense press of people are part of the adventure, but having to constantly guard my gaze is not. Every morning, we read the Times of India with breakfast, and there was always some prominent politician decrying violence against women. Top-level support (or at least lip-service) for women's rights is important, but, despite being very rarely in risk of real danger, it's going to be a long while before I feel completely at ease here.
A quick follow-up: the leering was definitely specific to Delhi. I don't feel that at all in Patna - there's a ton of staring, but it's very curious, not malicious at all.
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